Student | London 2018
“What was really inspiring was seeing the change start to take place in the other students.
Hi 4WN world 🌎 . If you are considering doing a 4WN, hopefully this will help you make the right decision. It’s my experience this past month (Sep-Oct) in London. Enjoy!
It’s hard to know where to start. How do you put into words one of the most deep and real emotional experiences of your life? How do you communicate the feelings that come with growth and the “ultimate state of evolution”? All I can really do here is record my own experience, my own change, my own results, and my own 4 Week Natural. That really summarises what is the best part of this program: it’s tailored to you and your own character. I was never treated as just some other student – none of us were. It wasn’t a “one size fits all” way of thinking. We were treated as real people, with very real expectations and very real compassion, and that’s what brought out our best. And who better to bring out the best in you, hold you accountable, and teach you everything you need to know about Game, but the best in the world himself: Alex.
From the beginning we were on a mission – six of us, all from different walks of life. We each wanted change, and we each wanted the answers to so many questions. When Alex first greeted us, he had a gleam in his eye; and by the end of the program I could see something similar in each of my fellow students. He told us what to expect, both emotionally and physically, and he told us what he expected from us. The atmosphere was electric.
After the introduction it was straight to business – our first night out. From the first venue, Alex was straight on it: “I can see what level everyone is at, just by watching them in set now…”. He gave me such useful feedback from the get go. He encouraged me not to camp too long on one particular group, and before I knew it I had a good thing going with an attractive blonde at the bar. Our team already had the attention of most of the girls at the first venue; we were the guys to meet. Alex told me to “float” out with my girl, and I walked her out when the venue closed (I would later learn that this is one of the most crucial parts of the Game – the front door rule).
The first weekend was incredible fun. I opened more “sets” than I could count, and learnt so much that my brain literally hurt. It was brilliant. The de-briefs following each session were beyond next level and beyond what we could have ever expected. Alex explained our interactions and the psychology at play (both in us and the women we met) to incredible depth and high level. From the beginning it opened up a new way of thinking, and more importantly a much healthier understanding of ourselves and of women, including what they desire and how they feel. He was patient and answered all of our questions. Some of what he told us was difficult to hear because it demanded real change within us, and letting go of parts of our own way of thinking, but that’s why we chose to do it – not for cheap results but for authentic internal change, understanding and freedom. What really hit home was how passionate Alex was, regardless of if he was tired or had had no sleep, everyday he was always on point. He also gave us so so many bonus sessions (both day game and night game), bonus infield breakdown, and bonus de-briefs. He was so invested in our success. It was awesome.
The best part was doing it with the other guys. Our stories, our moxie, and our results created an amazing and competitive group dynamic. It‘s called the “honeymoon period” in the beginning, because everyone is so positive and empowered. In terms of results… well… let’s just say every time we met up everyone had an adventure to tell – even after the bonus sessions. The days of leaving the club alone were a thing of the past (or at least became a rarity). In terms of daygame, I had three instadates and a number on the first weekend from only four approaches. This became the normal for all of us. Everyday I would wake up, look at my phone, and it would be either full of messages from girls I had approached, or unbelievable stories posted on the group chat from the night out before. It was insanity.
As the program progressed everyone had more and more success, but what was really inspiring was seeing the change start to take place in the other students. One of the guys who had initially come across as a very serious person, became brighter in the face and more expressive, and to a different student, I remember saying “Dude you look really happy and relaxed..” “I know.. it’s like Alex has pulled the plug on a lot of the stuff I had in my head before.. now there are no rules..it feels good”. The effect Alex was having on us, and that we were having on each other, was very real. I can’t quite describe the feeling of knowing that your coach and fellow students are watching you in set, fighting off chodes in the club, telling you what to do next, pushing you beyond your comfort zone. When we got results and demonstrated the principles of Natural Game, Alex would be ecstatic – it was a powerful thing. He taught us proper screening, how to structure the night, full range of expression, front door rule, the list goes on. Our group was solid; most of us already had a lot of experience from the beginning, which meant that we each learnt so much from one another, as well as our coach.
Although I was leaving with new people almost every night (one night I actually front doored a girl and her entire Spanish family – FDR for the win 💪 ), I still couldn’t yet say “a gentleman never remembers”…but that all changed for me in the final two weeks. I don’t have enough words here to describe what happened, but it ultimately pushed me through my comfort threshold once and for all. By the second day of weekend 3, I came to Alex and the rest of the group for our afternoon debrief. As an emotional wreck (I had had about 7 hours sleep over the past 3 days solid), I recounted to Alex and the guys what had happened to me the night before. A 5 star girl (Russian), had pulled ME from outside the local bar, and walked me with her friends to the McDonalds down the street. She tested me and tested me and tested me.. constantly. All I did was hold my value, and eat my McFlurry. By 4am it was just us left on the street.. and soon an Uber driver. A gentleman never remembers what happened next… and a gentleman never remembers what had happened the night previous, or the night previous to that, or the previous weekend either. It was the end of my struggles to evolve past my self doubts and fears with women. The events of that week was the ultimate proof to myself that there is no reason why I am not enough. Never again am I allowed to ask myself “am I attractive?” That dialogue no longer exists in my brain. After I recounted the story, Alex shook my hand, and awarded me the first polo of 4WN London 2018.
The learning and growth did not end there. At my halftime talk with Alex, he helped me understand and accept how I express myself, and how I contribute to other people, both men and women. I said “now that I have the polo… and after all that has happened this week.. I now feel like I have nothing left to prove”. He paused.. “be careful with that statement… because what you have just said is inherently ‘play to not lose’”. It helped me realise that in the Game, and in life, I have EVERYTHING to prove. There’s always more adventures to be had, more people to meet, more girls to fight for, more life experiences to enjoy – and THAT is truly ‘play to win’.
To top it off, Alex also took us out to take Tinder photos with his Hasselblad professional camera (this photo shoot itself is worth 2K.. but he gave it us for free as part of the program). We also had the chance to meet the other 4WN alumni in London, which was a great opportunity to network.
It was mega to have Luca join us in our final week. I am lucky to have known Luca from back in the day, and if you ever have a chance to work with him – then do. His charisma and genuine friendliness, is inspiring to be around, and I feel like he effortlessly brings out the best in those around him. He helped me understand a lot of what I was going through and helped me process the experience I was having on the program, which was an important part of the learning process for me.
At the end of the program we all celebrated together; no longer just students but steadfast friends. Each of us had earned our polo, and each of us had earned each others’ respect. It was so sad when the time came for Alex to leave, and I could have sworn I saw a tear in his eye when he did 😉. After he had left, we each shared a cigar, and each of us shared to the group what we respected about each other individually. It was my favourite moment of the program. I didn’t know these guys 4 weeks previous.. but now I felt like I had known them for years. They think like me, they share the same values that I do, and they are good people.
How has the 4WN changed my life? The two biggest takeaways for me was that there really is no reason why I’m not enough, which I learnt from the experiences and adventures. The second is my motivation to bring out the best of the girl when I meet her. I want to find out who she is – her positive emotions, her negative emotions, her sexuality, her heart’s desire, how she likes to express herself, all that good stuff. I’m inspired to approach by her beauty, elegance and expression, but I’m motivated to approach to find out what we can create and the best person I can bring out of her. That’s what sparks the gleam in my eye, and that is my role as a man. There are no more rules, and no more Game conditioning, no more social conditioning fogging it up. I simply ask myself “how can I make this easy for her, and how can I make this easy for me?” Simples.
Alex I can’t thank you enough man. You changed the Game for us all, and the 4WNLondon2018 salutes you. 4 times rule FTW